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	<title>Comments for LesbianDad</title>
	<link>http://lesbiandad.net</link>
	<description>notes from the crossroads of mother and father</description>
	<pubDate>Thu, 22 May 2008 20:01:56 +0000</pubDate>
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		<title>Comment on 11th of 20 by LesbianDad</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/19/11th-of-20/#comment-146872</link>
		<pubDate>Thu, 22 May 2008 18:15:21 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/19/11th-of-20/#comment-146872</guid>
					<description>When I was a kid, my family lived in Louisiana for a year, and I remember looking out the window at a sign on a shop that read &quot;Colored Laundry.&quot;  I thought: well that's the strangest thing in the world.  A whole laundromat for your stripes and plaids, and a whole 'nother laundromat for your whites.  People are funny down here.&quot;  Can't recall how my parents explained it.

The whole marriage equality issue invites many compelling comparisons to &lt;em&gt;de jure&lt;/em&gt; and &lt;em&gt;de facto&lt;/em&gt; racial segregation.  Not for nothing do so many point to Loving v. Virginia and the anti-miscegenation fight.  As many know, the California State Supreme Court made an early ruling in that sphere, too, in 1948 in Perez v. Sharp. Perez has been cited by many in the press in coverage of the &lt;i&gt;In re Marriages&lt;/i&gt; case just ruled on, perhaps since that ruling was a guidepost for the justices as they deliberated.  In the Wikipedia article on anti-miscegenation laws, it leads off the section describing &lt;a href=&quot;http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-miscegenation_laws#The_repeal_of_Anti-miscegenation_laws.2C_1948-1967&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;the last period of the anti-miscegenation repeals battles&lt;/a&gt;.

Two other aspects of that case are sobering.  One, while many states repealed their anti-miscegenation rights after Perez, the South stood firm.  The &quot;states' rights&quot; fig leaf that both Obama and Clinton hide behind smacks of cowardice and equivocation on a matter that should be absolutely clear.  The Wikipedia article notes Hanna Arendt's then-controversial statements about anti-miscegenation laws:

&lt;blockquote&gt;The free choice of a spouse, she argued in R&lt;em&gt;eflections on Little Rock&lt;/em&gt;, was &quot;an elementary human right&quot;: &quot;Even political rights, like the right to vote, and nearly all other rights enumerated in the Constitution, are secondary to the inalienable human rights to 'life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness' proclaimed in the Declaration of Independence; and to this category the right to home and marriage unquestionably belongs.&quot; &lt;/blockquote&gt;

Why controversial?  Because fellow liberals worried that such would, says the Wiki piece, &quot;arouse the racist fears common among whites and thus hinder the struggle of African-Americans for Civil Rights and racial integration.&quot;  Sounds familiar.  I consider it a major ethical shortcoming of both major Democratic candidates that neither has had the courage and vision to lead on this issue.

Sherry Wolf, in a piece in Socialist Worker, &lt;a href=&quot;http://socialistworker.org/2008/05/22/guess-who-opposes-gay-marriage&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Guess who opposes gay marriage?&lt;/a&gt; says:

&lt;blockquote&gt;There's something profoundly disturbing about Barack Obama, the son of a Black man and a white woman, calling for &quot;states' rights&quot; when it comes to same-sex marriage, especially since the California court cited as precedent in this case the 60-year-old decision that opened the door for his own parents' legal union.&lt;/blockquote&gt;

Indeed.

The other sobering parallel with &lt;i&gt;Perez&lt;/i&gt;, also noted when the CA Supreme Court decision was first announced: it took another twenty years for the federal Supreme Court to rule on the matter.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>When I was a kid, my family lived in Louisiana for a year, and I remember looking out the window at a sign on a shop that read &#8220;Colored Laundry.&#8221;  I thought: well that&#8217;s the strangest thing in the world.  A whole laundromat for your stripes and plaids, and a whole &#8216;nother laundromat for your whites.  People are funny down here.&#8221;  Can&#8217;t recall how my parents explained it.</p>
<p>The whole marriage equality issue invites many compelling comparisons to <em>de jure</em> and <em>de facto</em> racial segregation.  Not for nothing do so many point to Loving v. Virginia and the anti-miscegenation fight.  As many know, the California State Supreme Court made an early ruling in that sphere, too, in 1948 in Perez v. Sharp. Perez has been cited by many in the press in coverage of the <i>In re Marriages</i> case just ruled on, perhaps since that ruling was a guidepost for the justices as they deliberated.  In the Wikipedia article on anti-miscegenation laws, it leads off the section describing <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Anti-miscegenation_laws#The_repeal_of_Anti-miscegenation_laws.2C_1948-1967" rel="nofollow">the last period of the anti-miscegenation repeals battles</a>.</p>
<p>Two other aspects of that case are sobering.  One, while many states repealed their anti-miscegenation rights after Perez, the South stood firm.  The &#8220;states&#8217; rights&#8221; fig leaf that both Obama and Clinton hide behind smacks of cowardice and equivocation on a matter that should be absolutely clear.  The Wikipedia article notes Hanna Arendt&#8217;s then-controversial statements about anti-miscegenation laws:</p>
<blockquote><p>The free choice of a spouse, she argued in R<em>eflections on Little Rock</em>, was &#8220;an elementary human right&#8221;: &#8220;Even political rights, like the right to vote, and nearly all other rights enumerated in the Constitution, are secondary to the inalienable human rights to &#8216;life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness&#8217; proclaimed in the Declaration of Independence; and to this category the right to home and marriage unquestionably belongs.&#8221; </p></blockquote>
<p>Why controversial?  Because fellow liberals worried that such would, says the Wiki piece, &#8220;arouse the racist fears common among whites and thus hinder the struggle of African-Americans for Civil Rights and racial integration.&#8221;  Sounds familiar.  I consider it a major ethical shortcoming of both major Democratic candidates that neither has had the courage and vision to lead on this issue.</p>
<p>Sherry Wolf, in a piece in Socialist Worker, <a href="http://socialistworker.org/2008/05/22/guess-who-opposes-gay-marriage" rel="nofollow">Guess who opposes gay marriage?</a> says:</p>
<blockquote><p>There&#8217;s something profoundly disturbing about Barack Obama, the son of a Black man and a white woman, calling for &#8220;states&#8217; rights&#8221; when it comes to same-sex marriage, especially since the California court cited as precedent in this case the 60-year-old decision that opened the door for his own parents&#8217; legal union.</p></blockquote>
<p>Indeed.</p>
<p>The other sobering parallel with <i>Perez</i>, also noted when the CA Supreme Court decision was first announced: it took another twenty years for the federal Supreme Court to rule on the matter.
</p>
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		<title>Comment on 11th of 20 by dimplecheek</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/19/11th-of-20/#comment-145585</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 May 2008 22:33:52 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/19/11th-of-20/#comment-145585</guid>
					<description>My mother remembers &quot;white&quot; and &quot;black&quot; drinking fountains. I never had to see them. I hope my almost 3 year old son never remembers a time when we didn't give people the same rights as others, solely based on who they choose to love. It's a long over due step in that direction.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>My mother remembers &#8220;white&#8221; and &#8220;black&#8221; drinking fountains. I never had to see them. I hope my almost 3 year old son never remembers a time when we didn&#8217;t give people the same rights as others, solely based on who they choose to love. It&#8217;s a long over due step in that direction.
</p>
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		<title>Comment on 13th of 20 by LesbianDad</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/21/13th-of-20/#comment-144700</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 May 2008 14:46:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/21/13th-of-20/#comment-144700</guid>
					<description>I was at the zoo once, and saw a family was there, the dad of which was a devotee of the pants-falling-off-the-butt look.  It was the most amazing thing seeing how he negotiated -- with good humor, for sure, but it seemed with a touch of chagrin? -- his young daughter (four, maybe?), who kept shoving her pants down way below her butt and then giggling and speed-waddling ahead.  There seemed to be a perfectly sane part of him that felt, as an adult, that this was not the kind of thing you want to encourage in your child.  He was half-heartedly chiding/disciplining her, but then sheepishly laughing with another adult family member.  The irony was lost on no one.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I was at the zoo once, and saw a family was there, the dad of which was a devotee of the pants-falling-off-the-butt look.  It was the most amazing thing seeing how he negotiated &#8212; with good humor, for sure, but it seemed with a touch of chagrin? &#8212; his young daughter (four, maybe?), who kept shoving her pants down way below her butt and then giggling and speed-waddling ahead.  There seemed to be a perfectly sane part of him that felt, as an adult, that this was not the kind of thing you want to encourage in your child.  He was half-heartedly chiding/disciplining her, but then sheepishly laughing with another adult family member.  The irony was lost on no one.
</p>
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		<title>Comment on 13th of 20 by Vikki</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/21/13th-of-20/#comment-144697</link>
		<pubDate>Wed, 21 May 2008 13:51:22 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/21/13th-of-20/#comment-144697</guid>
					<description>That pants-falling-off thing has lasted MUCH longer than I ever thought possible. I am afraid it might be here to stay.</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>That pants-falling-off thing has lasted MUCH longer than I ever thought possible. I am afraid it might be here to stay.
</p>
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		<title>Comment on 11th of 20 by LesbianDad</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/19/11th-of-20/#comment-141512</link>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 May 2008 17:55:39 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/19/11th-of-20/#comment-141512</guid>
					<description>Okay, I had to add one more thing to this. I mean, if I break my prose post fast and actually write one, a modest one, just this once, I may as well not miss the opportunity to pack in more useful references &amp; links, right?

Chris Crain, of &lt;b&gt;Citizen Crane&lt;/b&gt;, has &lt;a href=&quot;http://citizenchris.typepad.com/citizenchris/2008/05/coming-soon-fro.html&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;a good, concise piece&lt;/a&gt; on why and how this initiative thing will be the battle royal.  He quotes Matt Coles, of the ACLU's &lt;a href=&quot;http://www.aclu.org/lgbt/index.html&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;LGBT Project&lt;/a&gt;. :

&lt;blockquote&gt;If we win the case and the initiative qualifies, we’ll be in the largest, most expensive, highest stakes political fight we’ve ever seen or are ever likely to see.  Our opponents will understand that if they lose, and the voters in effect ratify the court’s decision, their fight against marriage in America will ultimately be unwinnable. They’ll put everything they have into the election.&lt;/blockquote&gt; 

Go over and read the rest, if ye be in any further need of inspiration to roll up your sleeves.

Most of y'all are upper-to-date on this than I am.  But in the interests of helping any of us spread the news further and wider, I want to proliferate the links.  

Along those lines: fallout already falling out, in the form of familiar violence: Pam at &lt;strong&gt;Pam's House Blend&lt;/strong&gt; draws our attention to &lt;a href=&quot;http://www.pamshouseblend.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=5443&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;a gay bashing in Sacramento, hours after the court's verdict came down&lt;/a&gt;.

And if that sort of info helps motivate, I offer also this collection of conservative responses to the ruling: &lt;a href=&quot;http://www.pamshouseblend.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=5402&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;Heads exploding over CA marriage ruling&lt;/a&gt;.  I ordinarily try to avert my gaze from the worst of that malarkey, and heartily appreciate my sistren and brethren who have the stomach to go &lt;em&gt;mano á mano&lt;/em&gt; with the perpetrators thereof (and Pam sure is out there, bless her, with a iron stomach and a quick wit).  Just pass this on to folks who don't have a clear picture of the nature of the venom directed against us.

As preparation for what you'll read there, I include for you this image, which accompanies the post and which (one has to imagine) came from the hate forum that's quoted from in the piece:

&lt;img src=&quot;http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y49/pspauld/BlogPix/VoteFromRooftops.jpg&quot; width =&quot;250&quot; height = &quot;173&quot;&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Okay, I had to add one more thing to this. I mean, if I break my prose post fast and actually write one, a modest one, just this once, I may as well not miss the opportunity to pack in more useful references &#038; links, right?</p>
<p>Chris Crain, of <b>Citizen Crane</b>, has <a href="http://citizenchris.typepad.com/citizenchris/2008/05/coming-soon-fro.html" rel="nofollow">a good, concise piece</a> on why and how this initiative thing will be the battle royal.  He quotes Matt Coles, of the ACLU&#8217;s <a href="http://www.aclu.org/lgbt/index.html" rel="nofollow">LGBT Project</a>. :</p>
<blockquote><p>If we win the case and the initiative qualifies, we’ll be in the largest, most expensive, highest stakes political fight we’ve ever seen or are ever likely to see.  Our opponents will understand that if they lose, and the voters in effect ratify the court’s decision, their fight against marriage in America will ultimately be unwinnable. They’ll put everything they have into the election.</p></blockquote>
<p>Go over and read the rest, if ye be in any further need of inspiration to roll up your sleeves.</p>
<p>Most of y&#8217;all are upper-to-date on this than I am.  But in the interests of helping any of us spread the news further and wider, I want to proliferate the links.  </p>
<p>Along those lines: fallout already falling out, in the form of familiar violence: Pam at <strong>Pam&#8217;s House Blend</strong> draws our attention to <a href="http://www.pamshouseblend.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=5443" rel="nofollow">a gay bashing in Sacramento, hours after the court&#8217;s verdict came down</a>.</p>
<p>And if that sort of info helps motivate, I offer also this collection of conservative responses to the ruling: <a href="http://www.pamshouseblend.com/showDiary.do?diaryId=5402" rel="nofollow">Heads exploding over CA marriage ruling</a>.  I ordinarily try to avert my gaze from the worst of that malarkey, and heartily appreciate my sistren and brethren who have the stomach to go <em>mano á mano</em> with the perpetrators thereof (and Pam sure is out there, bless her, with a iron stomach and a quick wit).  Just pass this on to folks who don&#8217;t have a clear picture of the nature of the venom directed against us.</p>
<p>As preparation for what you&#8217;ll read there, I include for you this image, which accompanies the post and which (one has to imagine) came from the hate forum that&#8217;s quoted from in the piece:</p>
<p><img src="http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y49/pspauld/BlogPix/VoteFromRooftops.jpg" width ="250" height = "173">
</p>
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		<title>Comment on Weekend bonus shot, 05.17.08 by LesbianDad</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/17/weekend-bonus-shot-051708/#comment-141197</link>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 May 2008 05:21:59 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/17/weekend-bonus-shot-051708/#comment-141197</guid>
					<description>Har!  Yes well.  The freakishly neat and tidy would be the beloved.  Oops!  Did I say that?  

But.

It helps that we have a single, fairly modest-sized room that is the kitchen-living room-dining room.  So when we clean that one up, we're more than half the way there in cleaning up the house. 

Still, in the interests in full(er) disclosure:

&lt;a href=&quot;http://www.flickr.com/photos/pbfamily/2332074491/&quot; title=&quot;Untitled by LesbianDad, on Flickr&quot; rel=&quot;nofollow&quot;&gt;&lt;img src=&quot;http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3054/2332074491_721f8a2a37_m.jpg&quot; width=&quot;240&quot; height=&quot;135&quot; alt=&quot;&quot; /&gt;&lt;/a&gt;</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Har!  Yes well.  The freakishly neat and tidy would be the beloved.  Oops!  Did I say that?  </p>
<p>But.</p>
<p>It helps that we have a single, fairly modest-sized room that is the kitchen-living room-dining room.  So when we clean that one up, we&#8217;re more than half the way there in cleaning up the house. </p>
<p>Still, in the interests in full(er) disclosure:</p>
<p><a href="http://www.flickr.com/photos/pbfamily/2332074491/" title="Untitled by LesbianDad, on Flickr" rel="nofollow"><img src="http://farm4.static.flickr.com/3054/2332074491_721f8a2a37_m.jpg" width="240" height="135" alt="" /></a>
</p>
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		<title>Comment on Weekend bonus shot, 05.17.08 by Ansett</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/17/weekend-bonus-shot-051708/#comment-141189</link>
		<pubDate>Mon, 19 May 2008 04:55:11 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/17/weekend-bonus-shot-051708/#comment-141189</guid>
					<description>How do you keep your house so clean with two small children running around? Are they freakishly neat and tidy children?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>How do you keep your house so clean with two small children running around? Are they freakishly neat and tidy children?
</p>
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		<title>Comment on Extree, extree! CA Supremes say: Gay nupes a-okay! by IrreverendAmy</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/16/extree-extree-ca-supremes-say-gay-nupes-a-okay/#comment-140232</link>
		<pubDate>Sun, 18 May 2008 13:26:34 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/16/extree-extree-ca-supremes-say-gay-nupes-a-okay/#comment-140232</guid>
					<description>Mommymae, that's exactly the court's point:  we don't need any laws.  Under the California constitution, any pair of consenting adults already has the freedom to marry.  What we need is for the unconstitutional laws to be wiped out--and that's what the court did.  If you hear anyone call this &quot;judicial activism&quot; or &quot;the court overstepping its authority,&quot; tell 'em this is what the court is for:  to determine which laws are in keeping with the constitution.  They finally decided that HETEROS ONLY is not.  Yeeeeha!</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>Mommymae, that&#8217;s exactly the court&#8217;s point:  we don&#8217;t need any laws.  Under the California constitution, any pair of consenting adults already has the freedom to marry.  What we need is for the unconstitutional laws to be wiped out&#8211;and that&#8217;s what the court did.  If you hear anyone call this &#8220;judicial activism&#8221; or &#8220;the court overstepping its authority,&#8221; tell &#8216;em this is what the court is for:  to determine which laws are in keeping with the constitution.  They finally decided that HETEROS ONLY is not.  Yeeeeha!
</p>
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		<title>Comment on 10th of 20 by liferun</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/16/10th-of-20/#comment-137573</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 May 2008 20:38:05 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/16/10th-of-20/#comment-137573</guid>
					<description>I just LOVE me them colors!  Whoa!

:-)</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>I just LOVE me them colors!  Whoa!</p>
<p>:-)
</p>
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		<title>Comment on Extree, extree! CA Supremes say: Gay nupes a-okay! by mommymae</title>
		<link>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/16/extree-extree-ca-supremes-say-gay-nupes-a-okay/#comment-137492</link>
		<pubDate>Fri, 16 May 2008 19:30:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<guid>http://lesbiandad.net/2008/05/16/extree-extree-ca-supremes-say-gay-nupes-a-okay/#comment-137492</guid>
					<description>i'm still shocked that laws must be passed to say it's ok.  why shouldn't it be?</description>
		<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>i&#8217;m still shocked that laws must be passed to say it&#8217;s ok.  why shouldn&#8217;t it be?
</p>
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